A Heart That Forgives by Kevin Levar
At the end of my marriage as it started to spiral down hill I began to really seek the Lord with how we got here. The questions I asked him was 1. Where did we go wrong? 2. Where did I go wrong? His response to the 2nd question was that not only did you have unforgiveness against your husband but you had unforgiveness against your father which went all the way back to your childhood. Over a period of time because I never dealt with it when other things happened in my life and I didn’t know how to properly deal with them it only supressed them and began to poison me on the inside. My anger turned into resentment, into bitterness, into unforgiveness which began to manifest on the outside. I didn’t even like myself at times, but I didn’t know how to fix it, how do I fix me. Saved, sanctified, sho nuff filled with the Holy Ghost, but I was a mess hiding behind the masks that I had picked up over the years. We mirror what we see, not knowing it is killing us. So because of the unresolved issues with my dad I saw my husband as my daddy in some areas and I treated him how I treated my daddy added on top of things we were already dealing with. When God revealed to me of my unforgiveness it was like a light bulb went off in my head. Why didn’t I think of this before now. Though it wasn’t enough to save my marriage it was enough to save me. So I started working on getting myself together and getting healed. I repented and forgave of all. There was such a feeling of freedom and peace that came over me that I had never felt before. When I forgave my daddy not only did it began to heal our relationship, but the relationship of our family and me. It was like a trickle down effect. That unforgiveness held up a lot of areas in my life. Now I do whatever it takes to maintain it. It takes more energy to hold onto negativity than to just let it go. The reward in doing so is life changing. Sometimes it’s not the things that happen to us in life or the people in it that will kill us, but the things that we inhale, digest and allow to sit in our system. If we don’t continually clean out our system over a period of time it will become as a poison that will slowly work its way through our body system. Heaven forbid if it gets in our blood stream that will eventually break down the body system. You can go for years without any symptoms at all until what’s in you begans to manifest on the outside. Be careful of the silent killers: unforgiveness, resentment, bitterness, depression, anger, etc. Kill IT before IT kills you.
#CLEANTHISHOUSE