Category Archives: Uncategorized

I Don’t Look Like What I’ve Been Through


You will never be able to become what God has called for you to be without going through the process of:

Set Timing
May God bless you is my prayer.
“I Don’t Look Like What I Have Been Through”

Sure Foundation

As someone who has had a first hand experience in building a home I now know the importance of a sure foundation.  Before a house or any can be built the foundation has to first be established. The height and depth of the foundation is based upon the size of the building, the level of the land and the location so it will be able to hold it’s structure.  Also it has to be at a certain height in case of any weather emergencies within that area that it wouldn’t bring more damage to the home itself.  The foundation was laid and the cement was poured. Once it had dried they then placed anchors around the foundation to help secure the frame of the home.We first started by building the outside walls which were the lining the foundation of the home. Each wall had to be put up individually as their measurements were different and we also had to make sure that they were level before securing them into the cement.  In doing so this will insure that everything is  level and it doesn’t throw everything else off as we are building the rest of the home.  What an amazing feeling to put up that first wall of my home.  As we progressed on there were times that some where we were off in our measurements and our levels. Depending on how major it was either we had to take some of it down and replace it or we had to improvise to make it level out.   What really helped us along the way was the fact that we had a blue print to follow by which gave us the measurements. The some what disadvantage to us is that we don’t have access to the blue print of our lives.  The only one who has access to that is God, which is not always easy to follow.  Sometimes in life we want to go our on way, do our own thing that we loose our vision, stray away from God’s plan for our lives which then causes us to make a wrong turn or get lost within our travels. There are times when we may have to start over because of our wrong choices and decisions, but I found out right before the start of this New Year that we don’t always have to start over but we can take all of our hurt, pain and our life experiences good and bad to use as a foundation to build upon and start right where we are.  With every experience in our life it is teaching us something that will help us in our next season.  The good news for those that are God’s children is that even when we get off track  he has left us instructions which is his word and it he has left the Holy Spirit that will lead us along the way.  It is up to us to continue to follow his plan even when we can’t fully see our way or understand what he is doing.  Just like in building that home we had to trust and follow the blue print and even when we would get off track the contractors were there to steer us back into the right direction.  “On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand”  Any relationship that we are building in life we have to make sure that our foundation is sure so that when the storms of life come, which they will that it isn’t easily moved or destroyed.  Even when everything around us seems to be falling apart we are still standing because our foundation is sure.

Don’t Sale Yourself Short


I was having a conversation with my daughter yesterday and she asked me the question, Mom if you could buy a tablet for $50 or $60 would you? I then replied, No. She then asked me, Why not? I said, Something’s aren’t worth getting at a cheaper price because they don’t last long. She said, Ok.
Don’t get me wrong I am a bargain shopper and love looking for a sale anyway that I can. You know the saying though, “You get what you pay for (invest in) it. If I am going to spend my money or invest my time into something I want it to be worth it. Will what I have invested in last me a long time or will it last forever. As I get older I am wiser at the things I invest in. I need something that has quality, it is durable, it is strong and stands for something. I guess when you have wasted most of your life investing in the wrong things you only invest in the things that will bring longevity to your life, it will add and not take away, it will build you up and not tear you down, it has meaning. Be careful what and who you invest yourself in and don’t sale yourself short. You deserve the very best. YOU ARE WORTH IT!

Don’t Worry I’ve Got You

Severally weeks ago I had the opportunity to go on a hike. This was my 1st hike that I have taken since I was a teenager and I wasn’t prepared for what I was about to experience. It wasn’t anything that we had planned, but one of those seize the moment opportunities. In life we are presented with opportunities and if not recognized they will pass us by and once passed we may never get that opportunity again. Instead of seizing the moment we allow fear to keep and hold us in the place of “what if” and we miss the chance of experiencing new life. I decided to take a chance and seize the moment and experience new life and I am so glad that I did. The security guard let us know that they were about to do a hiking tour and if we wanted to join them he let us know where to go. When I went over to ask them about the tour he said that we would have to pay and sign up in advance, but that they were waiting for a few others and if they didn’t show up we could go if we wanted to wait. Long story short God favored us to be able to go. So the tour guide began explain to us about the tour and some of the things that we will be seeing. It was about 50 degrees outside and the sun was about to go down. The tour would take approximately an 1hr. The trail was 2 miles long and more than 1,000 ft deep. My first thought was I am going to freeze. I am a summer baby,so I get cold quick. I then remembered that I was already layered in clothing and that I also had on a jacket, so with us walking we should pick up some heat. We got to our first overlook and it was Amazing. As you looked in every angle you could see the height and depth as you looked upon the waterfalls it was just simply breathing taking. I love to be around water because it is so peaceful. Then I looked down. Let me just say it was a loooong way down. So I took my focus off of the way down and continued to enjoy the scenery. It was just breath-taking. The tour guide then said that we were getting ready to go down 310 steps and then in order for us to get to the bottom of the gorge we would have to go down 210 more steps. At that point it would up to us if we wanted to continue the hike. I realized that we were going to have to come back up those same 520 steps, but we had already paid our money so there was no turning back. As we continued our hike there were different overlook spots that you could stop at if needed or experience those “Awe” moments because of what you saw. At this moment I was feeling pretty good and the temperature wasn’t so bad because I picked up some heat as we walked. At each stopping point the tour guide would give us more insight on where we were and what we were looking at. I was thinking how cool this was and had we not seized the moment we would have missed out. We were coming close to our half way point before going down the 2nd flight of steps and though the tour guide had already told us what we would have to do to get there what I thought and what I saw before me threw me for a loop. We were at a suspension bridge that swayed back and forth which was about 800 ft above nothing but water and rocks. The closest I had ever come to a bridge like this was watching it on a movie and that is no comparison all to the real thing. I had never considered myself as being one to be afraid of heights. I have road on free falls, traveled on planes, literally helped build 6 homes from the ground up which all were 2 story homes accept one, but today I found myself afraid to go across. I didn’t think I was going to be able to do it. It felt like my stomach had dropped to the ground. I guess the fear showed on my face as someone grabbed my hand. He kept telling me your going to make it, you’re going to be ok, I got you. As we were going across the bridge I was asked was I ok or he would say just don’t look down, keep looking ahead. Why did he say that because what did I do,look down. We got half way across the bridge that swayed back and forth and we both gasped. He squeezed my hand and said you ok. Then he looked at me and said I got you. It was reassuring just to know that I wasn’t alone regardless how fearful I may have been. We finally made it across the bridge and we paused so that I could catch my breath. I looked back to see how far I had come. Then I was asked are you ready, as I took a deep breath I said, “Yes, let’s go” Sometimes in life we allow fear to keep us from making it across. The fear of I can’t do it, I can’t make it, what it looks like. I was reminded that no matter what the bridge or obstacle I have to cross, that I’m never alone. We were getting ready to go down 2nd flight of steps and the tour guide said that we could turn around and go back or we could move forward. At this point in life most people would turn around and go back or they become stagnated and unable to move forward. I heard that voice again as he grabbed my hand,let’s move forward. There were still areas where we could stop if needed, but this time there were less scenery parts so we decided to continue moving forward. When we finally got to the bottom of the gorge and OMG! You could look up and see how far down we were. In every direction you look it was breathing taking and the feeling I felt as I had exhaled because we had finally made it “there”. It was worth all that I had to go through to behold that on moment in time. I would have never experienced that moment had I gone back in the middle of the journey or never started at all. Through life’s journey we will experience many obstacles, trials and tribulations just to get to that one moment, but a lot of times we miss it because we are focused on what we are going through or experiencing at the time. Just like moments come, moments go and it was time to go back. I wasn’t ready to go, I want to stay in that moment forever. When I turn around and looked upward at all those steps that we now had to go back up I said, OMG in desperation as in “LORD HELP ME” As we started back up I could feel the weight, the pressure and the pain I my legs. I noticed that my breathing was a little heavy, I was having to take more stops this time going up and then when I came down. I was stumbling as I was struggling to make it up the next step. I was no longer worried about the scenery, I just wanted to get back to the top. I noticed that there were others who stopped along the way and we began to talk, share our experiences and encourage each other as we were going back up. I noticed the more that we kept going the harder it became, but at this point turning around would be pointless because there was no other way out than up. We got to the half way point “THE BRIDGE” that we now have to cross again. At the beginning we had an option to go back, but this time we only had the one option which was to move forward. This time I leaned more on the person that was with me and I felt more confident because I had already been this was before and I wasn’t alone. As we began the last flight of steps on the way up there were many times that I wanted to stop, but I keep getting pushed and coached to continue forward. We were at our last stopping point and as I looked at those steps and how I was feeling at the moment seemed impossible. The question was asked again, “are you ready to go?” I stood up, took a deep breath, grabbed his hand and we moved forward. We finally made it to the top. As I was breathing heavy, my heart beating fast I flopped down on the bench, lended back and in my mind I said, “I made it” I realized then there is a difference in going down the mountain than coming up the mountain. The tour guide was ready to take us to our final destination. As we walked around the corner to our to an over look and it was another breath-taking moment. We were at the very top when at one point we were only able to look up from it at a distance. I stood there in awe that I had finally made it and in spite of the challenges I had to encounter along the way I made it because I continued to move forward. In life you will come across paths that will seem uncertain, unstable and the way across seems long. While everything around you seems hopeless and the way down will kill you for sure and yet turning back has no promise of return. If you will just remember though at times you may feel lonely that you are never alone. God promised that he would never leave us nor forsake us, so continue to hold onto his unchanging hands.

Even On Broken Pieces

It Belongs To You by Deitrick Haddon

It was in August of 2002 when I was married at the time that we found out we were pregnant. We were sooo excited because we were trying to have a child, but yet in the midst of what should have been a happy moment I had this unsettling feeling that I wasn’t going to carry this baby to full term. I tried to avoid what I was feeling from within and still carry the mask of happiness when inside I was worried and afraid of “what if?” A month later I started bleeding which only confirmed what I was feeling. We went to the hospital and I had taken all the necessary test to confirm that I was having a miscarriage. And if that wasn’t bad enough they wanted me to have the rest of the miscarriage at home. I can’t even began to explain to you what I was feeling at that time. Later that evening I was in the bathroom still crying and for a moment I lost it as I took the glass and threw it up against the door. As I watched the shattered pieces fall on the ground I began to scream and ask God why did he do this to me. I was angry with God and the fact that I was home by myself. Days later when I came to I realized God was really protecting me. What if something was wrong with the baby, would I be able to handle that? I realized it just wasn’t time. Even though I trusted God, over a period of time I began to build more walls because I never let go of the fact that I was home alone. As women we have this natural habit of feeling like we have got to handle it all. Probably because somewhere in our childhood we had to defend ourselves, in our marriages, relationships, raising our kids even though the men were present yet they were absent. So when things happen we go in defensive mode, we build up walls and shields in thinking we are protecting ourselves when in yet we are hurting ourselves. It is in our brokenness that we can be restored, we can be healed and be made whole. It doesn’t mean that we are weak, but that we are still in need of him. He can’t help us if we are still trying to handle it all. He says come to me all ye who are heavy laden and I will give you rest. He never told us to bear it but to cast all of our cares upon him for he careth for thee. God will take all the broken pieces of ours lives and make us whole again, but we have to give him every broken piece.#CLEANTHISHOUSE

Don’t Allow A Tight Place To Confine You

I was on my way to the Women’s Correctional Center for Orientation Class to start volunteering and on my way I saw Youth Juvenile Center directly across from a school. It had several bobbed wired fences with corralled wire at the top to insure that there was no escape. There seemed to be a tighter security there then at the Woman’s. My heart began to break and my spirit began to weep. I have never been in prison or jail at least physically, but as I began to reflect back there was a time in my life that I was mentally and emotionally in prison. I allowed things that happen in my life and people imprison me, which started with my thought process. I battled depression and suicidal thoughts that kept me bound, enclosed, restricted from enjoying life, shut up and kept in. I was alive, but a dead man walking. I was walking around smiling but lifeless, shouting but lifeless, filled with the Holy Ghost, saved, sanctified and very involved in my local church, but I felt trapped and thought that there was no way out. Until one day I realized that this is not what God had for my life and that he had better for me. Regardless of what had happened or what was going on in my life that even in the midst of it all I could still be free. I began to reassess my life by acknowledging where I was. I repented and made a 180 turn and went in the opposite direction. I began to focus on me and less on the things that surrounded me. I forgave myself and others. I began to really apply the word to my life and watched things unfold before me. I decided to take my life back and let God lead. So now when problems come and situation arise I know how to channel it back to my source (God) who will handle it, instead of me carrying it. My greatest weapon has been my praise. It has gotten my through times that I’ve wanted to give up. When Paul and Silas were beaten and thrown into prison they didn’t allow where they were confine them, change their confession or belief which was that they believed God. In spite of their condition they made the choice to pray and give God praise. Miracles, signs and wonders happen when we believe. #CLEANTHISHOUSE

What Does Love Have To Do With It

Relentless by Hillsong United

Yup! Valentines is coming up, what are you going to do? Well I choose to love me and wait. I’ve sacrificed myself a life time trying to find Just Wright when only to find Just Wrong. I looked at myself in the mirror one day and realized you only attract who and what you are. Yes I am loving, caring, compassionate and when I love I love hard and you have me for life. But inside I was broken, had low self-esteem, jacked up, a mess and it was all because I didn’t love and value myself. I didn’t love enough to protect and care for the most important thing and that was me. I lost myself, but only to find her again. The moment I learned to love me was when my whole life changed. I REFUSE to settle for or sale myself short like I am a clearance rack item, to be purchased on a lay away plan or rented out like a house. I’m waiting for the best God has for me BOAZ which requires me to be the best me RUTH. You may say WHAT’S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT? It has everything to do with it because TRUE LOVE WAITS #CLEANTHISHOUSE