Tag Archives: LOVE

Embracing My Scars

“But he was wounded for our transgression, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed” Isaiah 53:5

Have you ever had an accident where it left a scar? Depending on the damage or severity of the accident would determine the type of scar it would leave or the length of time it would take for the scar to heal. If the damage is not attended to or handled properly it will cause a lasting scar with internal damage.

Scars remind me that I have been hurt but God reminds me that he can still heal

Scars can spiritually be a representation of things that have happened in our past by trauma experiences.  They can also be a representation of emotional scars that have not been dealt with.

Scars can sometimes be visible, while others are hidden. Some scars are big, and some are small. Even over a period some scars unresolved can still hurt and take longer to heal. If left unchecked they can leave a lasting memory that we wish to forget. Instead of healing from them we bury them and deeply embed them within our soul.

No matter the depth or height of our scars, there is no scar that God can not heal.  He has the power to heal us as if we have never been hurt. We must be willing to do the work it takes to be made whole.  When we allow God to completely heal our scars instead of coming from a place of hurt and pain, we can come from a place of healing, freedom, and peace.

My scars are a testament of what God can do. Through my experiences in life it was through my continued faith in God that brought me through.  Also, my continuing in pursuit to want to be mad whole and doing what is necessary to be set free. That meant I have had to deal with the man in the mirror and some ugly truths about myself.

“If the Son shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed” John 8:36

This journey is an ongoing process to the freedom that God has truly called us to live.  I am determined to continue in becoming a greater version of my last self.  My prayer is that you will be encouraged through the testimony of my scars.

Song List

In the Midst of Tragedy

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“But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;”

1 Corinthians 1:27

I did a follow up call with someone that I was talking with earlier today. She was concerned about whether she was going to get paid or not due to school closings. I found out the information that was needed and as a courtesy, I wanted to follow up with the call. In doing so it opened up a door for conversation. I didn’t know her and she didn’t know me, but we talked as if we had known each other forever and we talked on the phone for at least 15 minutes.


Do you sometimes wonder why does it always take a tragedy for us being a little more kinder, to show more love and support, going the extra mile, for us to be doing more of what we should have been doing already?

It would probably be safe to say that sometimes we forget, we lose sight, we lose touch or allow the cares of this life to cause us to be disconnected.

Though things are so uncertain at the moment and they have changed so many times in the course of a day. As people are hurting and in turmoil they grow weary causing them to be unsure of what to do next. It is in these moments in the midst of tragedy everywhere, that I still feel that there is hope for humanity. 

God knew us before we were even formed in our mothers womb and knows actually what it takes to get us back on the path that he has called for us to be. Just like the ingredients it takes to bake your favorite cake or meal, it is those ingredients of life that God uses to create us into who he has called us to be. Unfortunately, he uses a little of bit of tragedy, sorrow, along with joy, happiness, peace and discomfort, etc. and he mixes them all together to mold us an make us.

” Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am they God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will up hold thee with the right hand of my righteousness”

Isaiah 41:10

Sometimes things have to die, so that other things can live.  Dying to old habits, old mindsets, our selfish ways, so that we can birth to new habits, new ideas, create a better path that others may follow. It’s up to each one of us to be willing to make the necessary changes so that we will become better as a result of it. There is still life even in the midst of tragedy.

In this time of quarantine we should all be willing to do a self examination of the things we need to change within ourselves. What are the areas where we need to heal?  Is there someone we need to forgive? As much as we want things to go back to the way they used to be, things will never be the same again. 

Yet I still have this hope that we will all be better after this, as it is causing us to change and have a different aspect on life.  Only those that remain the same are the ones that refuse to change.

Here I am Lord, let the work begin in me!

“Create in my a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit with me”

Psalm 51:10-19

Song List

Holy Spirit by Kim Burrell https://youtu.be/hpOjwb9w1cU

Holy Ghost, fall down on me
Let Your spirit fall down on me
Holy Ghost, fall down on me
Let Your spirit fall down on me

Create in me a new heart, oh God
And renew a right spirit within me
Cast me not away from thy presence, oh God
Take not thy Holy Spirit from me

Holy Ghost, fall down on me
Let Your spirit fall down on me
Holy Ghost, fall down on me
Let Your spirit fall down on me

Holy Spirit help me to walk right
Talk right, live right, help me to be right
I’ll never do anything without
Your leading spirit, Holy Spirit

Cast me not from thy presence, oh Lord
Take not Your spirit
Take not Your spirit from me
Take not Your spirit from me
Take not Your spirit from me

The Value of Life

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They always say that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. What one person see’s value in another person may not see the same; therefore, is easily disregarded.  When I look at the things that are going on in this world it can be a little disharding and painful as there is little regard for God let alone someone’s else life.  Mark 12:31  “Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these” It is hard to love your neighbor when you don’t love yourself. They say love will make you do some crazy things, but what kinda of love is it that makes you come out of character and loose yourself enough to bring harm to others.  Is it really love?  Love should not make you hurt someone else let alone kill them.  Killing isn’t always physical. God knows we do enough damage with our tongue. If you have no love for others then you don’t love yourself. 2 Timothy 4:3 “For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears;”  I believe that we are in the end times and the saying “it may get worse before it gets better” is going to hold true, yet I still believe. You may ask how can I believe with what I see? Faith allows me to look with another set of eyes that looks past the things I can see in the natural and that gives me hope. There are so many levels and reasons why people do what they do, but it is very clear that it’s root is the value of one’s life. When you don’t love and value who you are then neither will you love and value the life of someone else. You spend you’re life trying to find it through other people who’s concept of love is already distorted. That in itself is enough to make you crazy. How can one love and value who they are if they don’t even know? The good news is your worth isn’t wrapped up in other people. Through the word of God you can find out exactly who and whose you are and the true meaning of love. 1 Peter 2:9 “But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light;” When we mirror ourselves after the image of God then and only then will we truly know who we are. You only decrease in value when you don’t know your worth. Knowing who you are is EVERYTHING!

Can You Be Trusted

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Declaration:
I AM faithful

Ephesians 1:1

Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, to the saints which are at Ephesus, and to the faithful in Christ Jesus:”

Whenever I am in a relationship with someone I am always faithful to that person. I don’t hang out with other men, even those who are my best friends. I try to be there for them. I watch my conversations and the company that I keep. I don’t seclude myself totally from others, but out of respect for them. Call me old school, but I don’t want to give any room for anything. Not that I think anything would happen or go wrong, but I feel when your with someone you wouldn’t have the need or desire to hang around someone of the opposite sex than you.  I know that everyone’s views are a little different, but that’s mine. I believe that you do need friends and  for me female friends have always been the lesser of the two, but yet and still I feel like there is a fine line when it comes to that. There should still be some type of boundaries. If you aren’t careful your friendships can sometimes come in between your relationships. Look at the relationship between a dog and man. He is faithful unto death. Wherever the master is there you will find the dog. When you are faithful to someone or anything for that matter not only is it building a form of trust, but respect, loyalty, strength, honesty, dignity and self control. Where there is no trust you pretty much don’t have anything. Matthew 25:21 His lord said unto him, Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.” Many of us want to be rulers, but yet we can’t be faithful to one thing whether it’s a relationship, our job, our church, etc. Our fleshly nature can sometimes  be selfish and want everyone to be committed to us and yet we aren’t committed to anyone but ourselves. Faithfulness not only will get us into places with man, but into the heart of God. Even though people may not always be as faithful and committed to me as I am to them because my heart has the desire to do right that I remain faithful even when they are not. That doesn’t mean that I become a fool and let people take me for granted. I don’t do it to seek the reward from man, but my Father which is in heaven. For greater is my reward when I please the Lord. 

More Than A Holiday

 

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I AM Thankful

Declaration:

Thessalonians 5:18 “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you”

Give thanks with a grateful heart
Give thanks to the Holy one
Give thanks for He has given Jesus Christ his Son
And now let the weak say I am strong
Let the poor say I am rich
Because of what the Lord has done for us give thanks

Today it was my hearts desire to be able to serve the homeless, but they had a fluctuation of volunteers so I wasn’t able to. Instead I drove around the city praying for those who were without, for those who have lost loved ones and those who have lost hope.  I also wanted to try and hand out some of the homeless care packages that the Lord placed on my heart to make. I like many others struggle during these holiday seasons, but as I began to intercede for others what I was feeling seemed less important. As tears filled my eyes I became grateful with in my heart. There were moments I couldn’t even express what I felt, but I knew the Lord could hear the sentiments of my heart.  No matter where I might find myself in life I am still able to be thankful to God, for my life could have so gone another way. He has done so much for me. Thanksgiving is more than just a holiday for everyday is the day of Thanksgiving. I thought about the story of the 10 lepers that were healed by Jesus, but only one of them came back to tell him thank you. There are some people that no matter what you do for them they are so ungrateful as if they deserve it. My prayer is that I would always stay humble before God and that I would always be one of the ones who comes back to tell him Thank You.

I’m Bought With A Price

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Declaration:
I AM redeemed from the curse of the law
Galatians 3:13 “Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us: for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree”

I am redeemed bought with a price
Jesus has saved my whole life
If anybody ask you just who I am
Tell them that I am redeemed
In times of old people were bound by a law (rules and regulations) in order for their sins to be forgiven, but when Jesus died on the cross for you and I he put himself in place of the ransom and redeemed us. He freed us from the law of old and now we can go bodly before his throne of grace for ourselves. When we accept him as Lord over our lives and believe that he is we become joint heirs with him. We become his sons. It is God’s desire that none would be lost, you would think who wouldn’t serve a God like that. It is sad to say that not everyone will accept him, not everyone will believe in him and even those that call on his name don’t truly love him for their hearts are far from him. God is a gentleman and would never force himself on anyone. To the one who is thinking about it, who haven’t quite made up your mind or maybe you are in a back sliden state it’s still not to late for you to accept him, it’s still not to late for you to come back home. Why wait when you can do it now. Repeat after me:
“Dear Lord Jesus, I know I am a sinner, and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe you died on the cross for my sins and that you rose again from the dead just for me. I trust and follow you as my Lord and Savior. Come into my heart and be Lord over my life. Guide my life and help me to do your will. In your name, Amen.”
If you said this prayer and your heart was sincere you are now saved and or have come back home. Welcome to the kindgom.

Just As I Am

I was sitting at my job one day  when all of a sudden I heard the most beautiful voice I had ever heard of in my life.  The sound that I heard was so pure, as if it were coming from heaven.  When I looked up it was a young man who was disabled. By looking at him you would have never expected that to come out of him. There were no words, just this beautiful melody. It would go in and out of melody to a noise, but oh how beautiful it was.  I was sitting there trying to hold back the tears because I had never heard anything like that and it touched my heart so. His voice would carry through out the waiting room and people would come out of the back wondering what was all that noise, but they failed to hear the melody that was flowing from his heart.  I would see the looks and feeling people wanting him to shut up, but they had no clue.  This wasn’t some ordinary noise that you would normally hear and because they weren’t tuned in they could not hear what I could hear.  It was music to my ears and some how brought peace to my soul.  I asked  his case worker had he always been disabled and she said yes. Wow! I was even more blown away.  He most definitely has a unique gift.  In my stupidity I began to think how much more he could be if someone knew how to work with him, to cultivate what he has. The Lord immediately rebuked me by telling me he is fine just the way that he is and I understand exactly what he is saying to me. I found myself repenting almost to the point of tears because of my thoughts.  Psalm 139:14 “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well”  When God created us, he created us in his image.  He already knew when he created us that we would not be perfect, that we would have flaws, dysfunctions and make  A WHOLE LOT of mistakes, but yet he loved us enough to still create us. In that one moment I almost lost sight of that very thing. We were wonderfully, fearfully created made by the Master and we are all unique in our own way. This world can be very cruel and harsh, but when we can grab a hold of who God has created us to be and tap into the uniqueness within ourselves, what he has given us needs to be shared with the world.  when God created you he broke the mold. Just think if we were all created the same.  Yeah! I know BORING, but he didn’t because of who you are, what he has created you to be and what you have to offer is what we need in this world that has grown cold.  When you look in the mirror and think about who you want to be like, dare to be the best authentic you that God has created to you to be. I always get excited when he comes in. So now when he comes into my Doctors Office I say here comes my Hummingbird. I smile big and listen to him sing. Not everyone will hear you, listen to you,  understand you, respond or even notice you.  They may even reject you, make fun of you or even ignore you, but don’t you ever stop being you.  Someone see’s you and love’s you just the way you are.

They Are Depending On Us

The other day I was going out to water my plants and some of the neighborhood kids came around me like flies asking could they help me.

I have been out here several times and have never had that happen. When I am in my garden this is normally part of my meditation time with God and to be honest I was needing that time, but I saw this as an opportunity to minister by way of help. I put my needs aside and humbled myself before God so that he could use me in that moment. So as I began to let them take turns some of them would try to spray the others, drink the water or play with it and I would have to guide them back to focus on what they were suppose to be doing while still having fun. It was a very simple task and I realize it probably had a lot to do with it being water, but the excitement and the energy they displayed in wanting to help made it hard to resist. My next door neighbor said if they are bothering you, you can send them back. I responded that they weren’t a bother. You know I love the kids and I will get them if I need to. Lol, he said please do. Two of the kids I had known since they were babies, but only one of them remembered me and she gave me a hug. She is 8 years old, boy do I feel old. As we completed the task together I told them thank you for helping me and they said you welcome with big smiles on their  faces and then they ran away. My heart was filled with joy, now that I miss. Back at my old church I worked with the Youth Ministry and they have always been one of my passions. Though I don’t deal with them in a great capacity as I did then I realize that was my teaching ground for what is to come and I try to be open to what he is doing now. The words that Jesus spoke are  so important as it gives us our direction, but I believe his greatest impact in his ministry was what he did. When I reflected back on it God showed me how I ministered to them at that moment. 1. You showed them how to serve 2. You gave them opportunity 3. You gave them direction along the way 4. You showed them love by allowing them to come in your space and with a cheerful heart 5. You showed them appreciation 6. They went away filled 7. You were ministered back to you. WOW! I was blown away. That happened within maybe 15-20 mins. We can sometimes make ministry so hard and really it’s that simple. I thank God for being humble enough and open to what he was trying to do in that moment. Although I may never know the impact that one moment may make on their lives, but Ican only image the thought if I would have turned them away.  It still takes a village. Don’t be so caught up in the former glory that you miss out on what God is trying to do through you now. He’s coming another way.

LOST AND FOUND

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Your looking for someone to respect you, yet you don’t even respect yourself. Giving yourself out like your some cheap piece of clothing you find on a clearance rack that can be put back if they don’t want it. He doesn’t value who you are because you don’t even value your own self-worth. As you continue to put yourself on a lay away plan and give yourself to the next man who can buy you instead of treating yourself as someone who has to be earned and not bought. You keep crying out to God where is my Boaz, yet you haven’t even prepared yourself to be his Ruth. Do you even know who Ruth is? You learn all the tricks and the trades, you put yourself on a hook like your bait and though you maybe able to hook the fish, but at the end of the day the bait you offered was good to taste, but not enough to make him stay. Your looking for love in all the wrong places trying to fill avoid, but you go unfilled because you keep filling that void with the wrong thing. Do you even know who you are, do you know who you belong to, do you really even know what love is? Come a little closer can you lend me your ear. There is someone who is just the perfect match for you and this love he will give to you no one else can compare my dear. See I use to be that girl who was lost and didn’t know my worth. My daddy never validated who I was as a little girl so as I became older I was on a search. Thought I had to have a man to tell me who I am and that with his touch it would make me have some self-worth, but instead it made me feel much worse. It wasn’t until I came across the great I am, you know that man they call Jesus who showed me who I really am. It wasn’t until I got lost in him that I found who I was. It wasn’t until I got lost in his love that I truly then knew how to love and how to be loved. I found out just how special I really am. That I am worth it, I am worth the wait. I use to be that girl who was lost, but now I’m found. It took me sometime, but I finally know who I am and to whom I belong.

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO GIVE

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When there are two individuals who happen to view something differently, in which most cases you will it doesn’t make one of you wrong or the other one right. It is just that you are two individuals that happen to see something differently. The true test of love is when you are able to work through your differences and not make the other person feel lesser than you because their process or way of thinking is different than yours. Don’t be so willing to pack up your bags and call it quits. I promise you it won’t be the last time that it will happen and even if you decide to move on there will be differences that you will have to work through there too. It’s not that your are loosing who you are, but your are gaining a greater in sight to who they are. It should be because of your differences that you find a greater love for each other. It’s not just about “Me or I”, but about “Us and We” and as you learn each other, the more that you will grow together. Instead of seeing through the eyes of two you will begin to see through the eyes of one while yet being an individual and staying true to who you are as a person. #truelovewaits